Verdict from the floor that night:
"What the...."
" Great sport! I love it!"
" I want a photo with you!"
" Soo cuutte."
" You look pretty hot yourself. "
"IS THAT YOU?... ..."
"... ... What?!"
Sometimes I think all we need is a little bit of madness to stay young, happy and free.
Just a little bit of madness.
Standing eyes closed with arms outstretched in the pouring rain, running barefoot in a lallang field like a child released from school into a playground, standing on a wooden chair in the middle of highway and touching the nightsky above... swimming against the grain of things. Day in, day out, we're living in a world that demands we be on time for work, we be conformed to people's expectations, we look, act and behave in ways people expect us to. Sometimes, don't you just want to do something totally crazy, unpretentious and unpredictable? Something fun, out-of-the-blue and yet totally true to yourself?
Without the glitz, bling and attitude. Just going out as yourself- stark naked, unpretentious, unpredictable, unusual, unthinking and uncompromising.
Breaking free from all expectations, having fun and giving maximum shock value and doing something totally untraditional, whacky and free. Just being you, a crazy part of you. Don't you want to do that too?
It was crazy and I was embarrassed and teased and giddy with laughter all at the same time. It was fun. No regrets, I think.
Except unphotogenic photos, yes.
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
Monday, August 27, 2007
The Struggle
I have been disturbed for a long time.
Blue skies, laughing children with smiles so wide they reached the edge of their faces, a feel-good time of playing, joking, tickling them, throwing time recklessly away in a scenic, rural land and taking photos madly before leaving- it seems like this is what mission trips have been reduced to. I went for a meeting with some missionaries lately and they coined a term that pierced right through me. Mission tourism, they said. Going on mission trips has become a fad among youth, trendy, almost.
Most young people are drawn to the fun and feel-good factors, but few realize the impact they make on communities overseas.
I was invited to a fund-raising banquet last night to raise funds for mission work in developing countries. There, I met up with the missionaries from Nepal who looked after me while I was there, and some more from Cambodia.
I was happy to see them. I smiled deeply, and then I saw a familiar group of faces, faces that belonged to a Cambodian orphanage that I visited with my college 2 years ago. I saw him and I covered my mouth involuntarily.
“Lam Da? Is that you? They let you come! ”
The brown cheeky 17 year-old face smiled broadly right back at me. He nodded.
I remembered him, and the many children at that orphanage in Cambodia, who had been brought up in an artificial third culture, where so many Singaporean short-term mission trippers like myself had visited and trampled all over the delicate Cambodian culture. I was no exception. Now, every time I recollect the memory, I am disturbed. The idea of an orphanage is beautiful, but the idea of raising too many children in a place where too many visitors come and go like voyeurs, leaving them feeling unstable, insecure and pampered is not.
Children in orphanages are not exhibits.
Andy Chan wrote an article on The Straits Times lately, questioning if such trips are merely “(unspiritual) desires to just do something now” and if they are “merely free or subsidised touristy jaunts masquerading as spiritual work.” He writes directly, “ Can short-termers actually help people who are linguistically and culturally different? Surely people-to-people relationships take not weeks but years to build. Long-term relationships foster mutual accountability, whereas one-off-never-to-be-repeated encounters don't.”
His article recounts studies conducted by US sociologists who, after rigorous investigations, found very little lasting positive change in goers or receivers. He writes cuttingly, “While such trips may be an exciting experience for goers - 'I have done missions!' - studies showed that all their good intentions to raise money to help others overseas, for instance, tended to have dissipated away just months afterwards.”
He continues: “Goers must stop thinking they go to serve poor Third Worlders. Instead, they should conceive of their trips merely as ways to learn about another people and their problems. Also, they should understand that what happens during the trip - Did I hug enough orphans in Afghanistan? Did I treat enough sick Afghans? - is not important. Instead, what happens after they come back is more important: Will I consistently raise more money for Afghan orphans now? Will I support materially Afghan doctors who stay on for the sake of their countrymen despite all the hardship they
face? And so on.”
His article was not an easy read.
I believe there is a balance that must be struck. On one hand, we chastise the short-term mission trippers for treating the orphanages like zoos, and tainting a pure culture; on the other hand, many of such mission trips were the launching pad for many a long-term missionary who eventually stayed to build a lasting humanitarian ministry and made lifelong, sustaining changes to the lives of the less fortunate.
I’ve had so many people ask me, “Why don’t you organize a medical mission trip for your classmates since you’ve had some experience?”
How do I begin to tell you what I feel about this? How do I begin to explain to you the social ills that have arisen, the mixed feelings I have when people enter orphanages and snap photos madly, spoiling the children, promising them gifts and the word of their return, when they never intend to go back in the first place? Children in orphanages have hearts that break, too. Loving them is treating them right, not by giving them instant affection for our own feel-good rewards, but by treating them responsibly.
Even more, how do I even begin to tell you that for all my self-righteousness and protectiveness, that every minute I am there, I struggle with all these things too. I struggle in knowing that all my undoing is justified, or perhaps not, because of God’s calling for me to be a missionary, and I struggle even more knowing that our hearts are deceitful- I could very well end up in a cushy job and forget about this naïve calling for good.
Some people say I ought not to feel guilty. After all, after returning from Nepal, there was follow-up action and Kitesong made lasting changes to the lives of the children. But what you don’t know is- when I went on the trip, I didn’t know if I was going to be a long-term missionary. I didn’t know I would write a book for them, I didn't even know I would go back. I have no relationship with altruism and I am human.
So what do I say about this? If you want to go on a short-term mission trip, who can stop you? It could very well be the seed sown in your heart waiting to bloom the Mother Teresa within you. It could be the beginning of a beautiful, beautiful thing.
But promise me, search yourself and try and understand that we have the power to do more damage than good. Search deep within and question your motives and intentions. Pray much, and ask yourself if your reasons justify the possible damage done. When you can question yourself till it hurts, till the point you are unsure and doubtful and writhing inside because of your struggling, till the point where you feel small and humble and you feel like crying, then it is time to go.
And when I’m listening to a long-term missionary speak at a conference or at church, please look away from my face, wet with snot, because I am struggling too.
Blue skies, laughing children with smiles so wide they reached the edge of their faces, a feel-good time of playing, joking, tickling them, throwing time recklessly away in a scenic, rural land and taking photos madly before leaving- it seems like this is what mission trips have been reduced to. I went for a meeting with some missionaries lately and they coined a term that pierced right through me. Mission tourism, they said. Going on mission trips has become a fad among youth, trendy, almost.
Most young people are drawn to the fun and feel-good factors, but few realize the impact they make on communities overseas.
I was invited to a fund-raising banquet last night to raise funds for mission work in developing countries. There, I met up with the missionaries from Nepal who looked after me while I was there, and some more from Cambodia.
I was happy to see them. I smiled deeply, and then I saw a familiar group of faces, faces that belonged to a Cambodian orphanage that I visited with my college 2 years ago. I saw him and I covered my mouth involuntarily.
“Lam Da? Is that you? They let you come! ”
The brown cheeky 17 year-old face smiled broadly right back at me. He nodded.
I remembered him, and the many children at that orphanage in Cambodia, who had been brought up in an artificial third culture, where so many Singaporean short-term mission trippers like myself had visited and trampled all over the delicate Cambodian culture. I was no exception. Now, every time I recollect the memory, I am disturbed. The idea of an orphanage is beautiful, but the idea of raising too many children in a place where too many visitors come and go like voyeurs, leaving them feeling unstable, insecure and pampered is not.
Children in orphanages are not exhibits.
Andy Chan wrote an article on The Straits Times lately, questioning if such trips are merely “(unspiritual) desires to just do something now” and if they are “merely free or subsidised touristy jaunts masquerading as spiritual work.” He writes directly, “ Can short-termers actually help people who are linguistically and culturally different? Surely people-to-people relationships take not weeks but years to build. Long-term relationships foster mutual accountability, whereas one-off-never-to-be-repeated encounters don't.”
His article recounts studies conducted by US sociologists who, after rigorous investigations, found very little lasting positive change in goers or receivers. He writes cuttingly, “While such trips may be an exciting experience for goers - 'I have done missions!' - studies showed that all their good intentions to raise money to help others overseas, for instance, tended to have dissipated away just months afterwards.”
He continues: “Goers must stop thinking they go to serve poor Third Worlders. Instead, they should conceive of their trips merely as ways to learn about another people and their problems. Also, they should understand that what happens during the trip - Did I hug enough orphans in Afghanistan? Did I treat enough sick Afghans? - is not important. Instead, what happens after they come back is more important: Will I consistently raise more money for Afghan orphans now? Will I support materially Afghan doctors who stay on for the sake of their countrymen despite all the hardship they
face? And so on.”
His article was not an easy read.
I believe there is a balance that must be struck. On one hand, we chastise the short-term mission trippers for treating the orphanages like zoos, and tainting a pure culture; on the other hand, many of such mission trips were the launching pad for many a long-term missionary who eventually stayed to build a lasting humanitarian ministry and made lifelong, sustaining changes to the lives of the less fortunate.
I’ve had so many people ask me, “Why don’t you organize a medical mission trip for your classmates since you’ve had some experience?”
How do I begin to tell you what I feel about this? How do I begin to explain to you the social ills that have arisen, the mixed feelings I have when people enter orphanages and snap photos madly, spoiling the children, promising them gifts and the word of their return, when they never intend to go back in the first place? Children in orphanages have hearts that break, too. Loving them is treating them right, not by giving them instant affection for our own feel-good rewards, but by treating them responsibly.
Even more, how do I even begin to tell you that for all my self-righteousness and protectiveness, that every minute I am there, I struggle with all these things too. I struggle in knowing that all my undoing is justified, or perhaps not, because of God’s calling for me to be a missionary, and I struggle even more knowing that our hearts are deceitful- I could very well end up in a cushy job and forget about this naïve calling for good.
Some people say I ought not to feel guilty. After all, after returning from Nepal, there was follow-up action and Kitesong made lasting changes to the lives of the children. But what you don’t know is- when I went on the trip, I didn’t know if I was going to be a long-term missionary. I didn’t know I would write a book for them, I didn't even know I would go back. I have no relationship with altruism and I am human.
So what do I say about this? If you want to go on a short-term mission trip, who can stop you? It could very well be the seed sown in your heart waiting to bloom the Mother Teresa within you. It could be the beginning of a beautiful, beautiful thing.
But promise me, search yourself and try and understand that we have the power to do more damage than good. Search deep within and question your motives and intentions. Pray much, and ask yourself if your reasons justify the possible damage done. When you can question yourself till it hurts, till the point you are unsure and doubtful and writhing inside because of your struggling, till the point where you feel small and humble and you feel like crying, then it is time to go.
And when I’m listening to a long-term missionary speak at a conference or at church, please look away from my face, wet with snot, because I am struggling too.
Monday, August 20, 2007
DIY Dorm Rooms
It is back to school time and for many young adults that means dorm room design time.
You can design a room that is funky and bold, modern and clean or soft and sophisticated just make sure it reflects your personality.
For the sleeping zone cut up old t-shirts and stitch them into easy pillows. Just sew around all the sides, leave a little opening, stuff with pillow stuffing and stitch closed. Or cut your old tees into blocks and stitch together to create a quilt. Use fabric paint and stencils to add fun sayings, shapes, poetry or song lyrics to plain comforter. If you need extra storage try using bed risers and under bed storage boxes for items that you don’t access everyday.
Decorating the walls is a great way to show off you personality! You can custom print your own posters with linen paper or check out websites like the poster list for cool artwork. Add polka dots to your walls by placing vintage fabric in embroidery hoops and attach to your walls with poster adhesives. Add an art line by stringing wire across the walls and clip art, postcards and magazine cutouts to the line with small clothes pins or paper clips.
Create an organized study area by recycling tin cans and decorate them with wrapping paper scraps. Add style to plain desk by decoupaging a poster or color copies of photos to the front and top of the desk. This can also be don on a small table or a dresser.
Keep refreshed and look cool with a custom painted mini fridge! It is easier than you think and the results are so cool. So grab a brush, get creative and do it yourself.
Mini Fridge Make Over Supplies:
square
coarse-grit sandpaper
clean rag or towel
primer
low tack painter's tape
paintbrushes
pencil
three shades of semigloss latex paint
round objects to use as circle tracers
Steps:
1. Lightly sand the outer front and sides of the refrigerator. Rub the refrigerator with a clean rag or towel to remove any dust.
2. Tape off any hardware or trim with low-tack painter's tape.
3. Prime, allow the primer to dry and apply a second coat. Allow the second coat to dry. The primer will help the paint adhere to the plastic surface and prevent flakes and peels.
4. Paint the entire refrigerator with the medium shade of paint. Allow the first coat to dry and add a second coat. Allow the base coat to dry for about 3 days so that it completely cures.
5. Use round objects, such as mixing bowls, pots and pans, to trace overlapping circles on the refrigerator in pencil.
6. Apply the lightest and darkest shades of latex paint to the appropriate portions of the design. Allow the paint to dry and apply another coat. Allow the paint to cure for three days.
You can design a room that is funky and bold, modern and clean or soft and sophisticated just make sure it reflects your personality.
For the sleeping zone cut up old t-shirts and stitch them into easy pillows. Just sew around all the sides, leave a little opening, stuff with pillow stuffing and stitch closed. Or cut your old tees into blocks and stitch together to create a quilt. Use fabric paint and stencils to add fun sayings, shapes, poetry or song lyrics to plain comforter. If you need extra storage try using bed risers and under bed storage boxes for items that you don’t access everyday.
Decorating the walls is a great way to show off you personality! You can custom print your own posters with linen paper or check out websites like the poster list for cool artwork. Add polka dots to your walls by placing vintage fabric in embroidery hoops and attach to your walls with poster adhesives. Add an art line by stringing wire across the walls and clip art, postcards and magazine cutouts to the line with small clothes pins or paper clips.
Create an organized study area by recycling tin cans and decorate them with wrapping paper scraps. Add style to plain desk by decoupaging a poster or color copies of photos to the front and top of the desk. This can also be don on a small table or a dresser.
Keep refreshed and look cool with a custom painted mini fridge! It is easier than you think and the results are so cool. So grab a brush, get creative and do it yourself.
Mini Fridge Make Over Supplies:
square
coarse-grit sandpaper
clean rag or towel
primer
low tack painter's tape
paintbrushes
pencil
three shades of semigloss latex paint
round objects to use as circle tracers
Steps:
1. Lightly sand the outer front and sides of the refrigerator. Rub the refrigerator with a clean rag or towel to remove any dust.
2. Tape off any hardware or trim with low-tack painter's tape.
3. Prime, allow the primer to dry and apply a second coat. Allow the second coat to dry. The primer will help the paint adhere to the plastic surface and prevent flakes and peels.
4. Paint the entire refrigerator with the medium shade of paint. Allow the first coat to dry and add a second coat. Allow the base coat to dry for about 3 days so that it completely cures.
5. Use round objects, such as mixing bowls, pots and pans, to trace overlapping circles on the refrigerator in pencil.
6. Apply the lightest and darkest shades of latex paint to the appropriate portions of the design. Allow the paint to dry and apply another coat. Allow the paint to cure for three days.
Sunday, August 19, 2007
The 99th Birthday Party!
My Grandmother on her 99th birthday!
By now lots of people know that my Grandmother taught me how to sew and that she is super crafty, thrifty and creative.
What most people don't know is that she just turned 99 and she is still full of creative energy. Her eyesight has failed her but that does not stop her from being creative. For her party she made all the favors and painted so many items for every one to take....bird houses, doll furniture, jewel boxes, sail boats, flowers, etc.
Just a tiny sample of what she created for the party!
Tornado in Tulsa
I totally felt like I was in a tornado while in Tulsa. So much to do and so much fun to have! I got to see tons of family and we celebrated my Grandmother's 99th birthday!
The trip started with a famous Oklahoma meal! Chicken fried steak at the Tulsa Press Club. It was so good! My uncle Bill told me it was the kind of meal that sticks to your ribs.
Chicken Fried Steak at the Tulsa Press Club
Newt we were off to Good Day Tulsa. The host, Kirsten Dickerson, was so sweet and fun to work with. On the show I made flower glazed brie and a green salad with flowers, honey glazed walnuts and a raspberry vinaigrette. Steve made flower printed napkins by using a mallet and pansy petals.
Setting up for Good Day Tulsa.
(My cousin Mikey came along with us...she was an awesome assistant.)
The host Kirsten Dickerson.
Flower Salad - so beautiful.
This is a party favorite! People go crazy for the flower glazed brie.
Next stop Grandmother's Party....
The trip started with a famous Oklahoma meal! Chicken fried steak at the Tulsa Press Club. It was so good! My uncle Bill told me it was the kind of meal that sticks to your ribs.
Chicken Fried Steak at the Tulsa Press ClubNewt we were off to Good Day Tulsa. The host, Kirsten Dickerson, was so sweet and fun to work with. On the show I made flower glazed brie and a green salad with flowers, honey glazed walnuts and a raspberry vinaigrette. Steve made flower printed napkins by using a mallet and pansy petals.
Setting up for Good Day Tulsa.(My cousin Mikey came along with us...she was an awesome assistant.)
The host Kirsten Dickerson.
Flower Salad - so beautiful.
This is a party favorite! People go crazy for the flower glazed brie.Next stop Grandmother's Party....
Wednesday, August 8, 2007
Cathie's Bio
She’s crafty!Cathie is an Emmy Nominated television host, book author, lifestyle expert, inventor and handcraft designer. Her bubbly personality and enthusiasm for all things creative makes her a winner with audiences worldwide.
She created, produced and co-hosted more than 100 episodes of the HGTV & DIY
lifestyle show Creative Juice. She also created and hosted the Emmy Nominated
mini-series Witch Crafts. Cathie has also appeared on numerous network shows,
specials and promos for NBC, ABC, Discovery Channel, HGTV, DIY and Food Network. Programs such as Rachael Ray, IVillage Live, View From the Bay and the Florence Henderson Show have featured Cathie as a "lifestyle expert".
Just two years after stepping in front of the camera, Cathie was nominated for two
Daytime Emmys. (With the category company of Martha Stewart, Emeril Lagasse and Paula Deen.) Her nominations were for Outstanding Lifestyle Host and Outstanding Lifestyle Program. In addition to being nominated, Cathie was a presenter for the 34th and 35th Daytime Emmy ceremonies.
Cathie is the author and project designer of 4 books. 101 Tees (Summer 2011), 101 Snappy Fashion, Bow Wow WOW! and Creative Juice – 45 Re-Crafting Projects. All books are published by Lark Books. She also writes Home Hobbies, a monthly syndicated newspaper column for United Features and she contributes to national shelter publications such as Real Simple, Better Homes and Gardens, Redbook, Womens World, Life Magazine and many others.
Cathie is a National Spokesperson for Plaid Enterprises, one of the largest manufactures of art and craft products in the United States. Cathie appears
on HSN and QVC showcasing Plaid’s newest products.
In 2010, Cathie made her debut as one of the faces for Dove Beauty: Real Women Real Beauty. She was chosen to appear along with other women in America for the new documentary style campaign. Look for Cathie’s campaign on Oprah.com.
In January 2011, Cathie’s invention Hot Glue Glue Helpers, a line of tools for working with hot glue will hit the craft shelves. Look for them at all the major retailers and craft stores.
Cathie Filian grew up in the Midwest and has been getting crafty since she can remember. She began sewing when she was 8 and her love of stitching followed her all the way to college, where she studied Textile Science and Fashion Design at Ohio State University. In her senior year, Cathie was awarded the Outstanding Senior Design Award.
Before stepping "in front" of the camera, Cathie worked in the film business creating
costumes for films such as Rushmore, Twister, Heartbreakers and Vanilla Sky. She has styled some of Hollywood’s leading ladies and gents.
Cathie lives in Los Angeles with her husband, Eddie and their dog Max.
Follow Cathie on her blog, on facebook and on Twitter.
Monday, August 6, 2007
DePaul Book Signing!
We had such a great time at DePaul! We met some lovely CJ watchers. One gal (Dawn?)makes the cutesiest Little Kiddle jewelry. Her earring were so adorable...she said she will start selling on etsy soon. I know I will getting a pair of her earrings. :)
We met tons of kids! Everyone choose their own kooky kritter supplies and took home bottles of Mod Podge!
This young fella has been working on our disco ball project!
Chicago was so fun....The best part was getting to see all of Steve's family! xoxoxoxo
After the signing we had delicious appetizers and cocktails with comcast at The Chicago Firehouse restaurant. They were comcastic!
We still had a little energy so we headed to the CUBS game! Check out all the people on the roof. We did not actually go in the game we went to the famous "Cubby Bears"
I am still tired from Chicago! Tomorrow morning I fly to Tulsa, Oklahoma for my Grandmother"s 99th birthday and a book signing at Barnes and Noble on August 9th at 7:00pm. The best part about the Tulsa trip is that my hubby will be joining me and I get to see my family! YEA!
Friday, August 3, 2007
About Last Night
So after a full belly of pizza...Steve and I caught the L train to Mothers! Mothers is the bar that the classic 80's film "About Last Night" was filmed. We had so much fun!
Do you think we are having fun?
Wednesday, August 1, 2007
Book Tour: Chicago Pizza!
Last night Steve and I have the most fabulous and delicious pizza at Gino's East in Chicago. This place is a classic Chicago Pizza restaurant. The walls are covered with signatures, love notes and phone numbers. When Steve was in school he penned his name on the walls but of course we cold not find his name. The food was delicious!
Check out the WALLS!
YUMMMY!
Book Tour: Play Time in Chicago
We landed in Chicago! Steve is in hog heaven (he is from here) and we are doing all sorts of fun stuff. We walked around downtown, checked out the buildings, shopped and of course ate piazza!
Here are a few pics:
Here are a few pics:
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