Just so I remember.

* Letter pubished with permission

Hey Waijia,

I'm not sure if you remember me. I came to support group with X about a year-ish ago and at that point, I think you had just recovered... I remember the initial impact you had on me- that you were a genuinely caring person that I could trust and would want to be in contact with. And I remember texting you and talking to you.

At that point, I was still really sick and really far and distant from God. You invited me to church countless times, asked me out, constantly reassured me that everything would be okay. I knew you cared, and you seemed to understand, but at that point, God to me, was just there. He wasn't real. He was just some figure that I guess had somewhat of a role to play in everything. But I had no real relationship with him, he was more of an authority figure with a fullstop. Not a friend, not a father and it just scared me to think of him to be anything more than that- I didn't want to commit or deal with more hurt than I had at that point, that I continue to have. I can't remember when we exactly stopped talking but I just want you to know Ive been reading your blog, and sometimes I even see you around the hospital...Yeah, sad to say (I guess..), I'm still looking and trying to recover.

But recently, I'd say, its been different, I've DEVELOPED and grown so much in God and with God and I think I'm really starting to learn that he plays a role in my recovery. That I need to recover for him and can only do so through him.

Theres so much I want to say through this email but mainly, I guess thanks :) Thanks for being there at that point, thanks for writing and I just want you to know how much of an inspiration you are to me (and I'm sure many others). Reading your blog gives so much hope and its just incredible :)


Cheers and God bless!


XX

P.S: I just have a pretty random question, was it more a process for you? Or was it just a "great awakening" one day? In terms of realizing that you had to fully give it up and surrender it to God?

Thank you for making a difference to my life, too dear. And for letting me know my experience was not for naught. In the same way, your experience will also help someone else along the way someday.

To answer your question, Recovery is all about Process. Walk your journey with God.

Love.

Near midnight, I received a text message from a face I hardly talked to:

Hi Wai Jia, I was reading your blog and am greatly encouraged by your writing. Thank you for sharing so richly :)

Thank you for your precious words. They mean much to me. I just want to remember these 2 letters which came in yesterday so I can read it again when someone hits me in the face in malice about my writing, which does occur from time to time. Philip Yancey says it takes 17 postive letters to erase 1 hate mail he receives, ha.

Thank you.